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[Hope Cotner, CORD] Hello and welcome to the NC-NET Webinar Series,
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designed to share promising practices from community colleges across North Carolina.
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Today's webinar is presented by Gigi Derballa
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and facilitated by Liz Watkin from AB Tech.
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[Liz] Okay, welcome to our webinar on Understanding Generational Poverty.
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My name is Liz Watkin, and I am an Instructional Designer
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with Asheville Buncombe Technical Community College.
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And with me is a colleague from the college, Gigi Derballa,
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who I will be asking questions of about generational poverty.
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Gigi Derballa has a BA in Philosophy and an MA in Literature.
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She has taught Humanities since 1986,
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and is the current Chair of the Humanities Department here at AB Tech.
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She has also taught an Ethics class for Mars Hill College for eight years,
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which focused on poverty and social justice.
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So, thank you so much, Gigi, for joining us.
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[Gigi] Thank you, Liz.
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[Liz] And I'm gonna ask your first question, which is,
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"Why is this topic so important to you?"
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[Gigi] This topic is important to me because, in my own life,
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I came from a kind of a mixed family.
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Well, my mother came from poverty, and my father did not.
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Came from middle class. And so, they have a lot of kids.
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And it's interesting to see which of us followed the path of my father
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into education in middle class and those that
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kind of took on more of the values of my mother's upbringing.
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And I think that it's not just my own personal curiosity,
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but I think that we all should understand generational poverty.
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Because about 20% of Americans live in generational poverty.
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And despite our cultural norms, our different values, we are all human,
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and deserve our basic human rights.
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I go back to Eleanor Roosevelt's Universal Declaration of Human Rights
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that she helped put together in response to the atrocities of World War II.
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But I think many of those rights she outlined should be foremost
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in American politics and American life.
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Eleanor Roosevelt believed, as I do, that every human deserves respect,
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education, dignity, a supportive environment, and life in a community.
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I'd like to add that, here in America, as a very wealthy nation, I believe
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we all deserve clean water, electricity, medical care, and food security.
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There is enough for all of us here.
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We must find a balance of individual rights and responsibilities
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to make America a true community.
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A few of you might question, as we go along,
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"Why should you support grown, healthy adults who can work for themselves,
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and maybe choose not to? And choose to live in poverty?"
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Well, if you're worrying about your tax dollars going there,
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they already are! Do you know how much our welfare system costs?
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Our prison systems? Our charity health care? Any one of those systems
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probably cost a whole lot more than providing education support
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and basic rights to all human beings.
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So that's why I care about this. I'm sorry, that was a long answer.
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Let's delve into some of the characteristics.
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[Liz] That was great! Thank you.
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[Gigi] Quick note, as we go along.I want to mention that,
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in this presentation, we will be talking about generalizations.
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There are always exceptions.
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[Liz] First of all, we talked about, "Who is this presentation for?"
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[Gigi] This presentation, I think is best for probably naive middle-class people,
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who don't know a lot about poverty, who might say things like,
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Why should I support a healthy adult?
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Instead of that person working and getting a job like I do?"
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Well, that kind of person will probably gain a lot from this presentation.
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[Liz] Wonderful. So, we have three types of poverty that you talked about.
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What are these three types? And how are they different from each other?
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[Gigi] Okay, that's a pretty quick and easy answer.
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There are three types of poverty.
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There's situational poverty.
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And that's when you and I could be after Christmas,
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when we've just spent a lot of money on the kids for Christmas.
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Situational poverty, also for college students.
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I don't know about you, but I ate a lot of the ten cent ramen noodles
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when I was in college! So, that's situational poverty.
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Means you're not always in it.
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There's a time in your life you are, but you'll get out of it.
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Then there's the working poor, another type of poverty.
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There's much to say about the working poor, but that's not our focus today.
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What I want to focus on is the third type of poverty, known as Generational Poverty.
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And that is when you come from parents of poverty,
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and pick up those values, and norms, and pass it on to your own children.
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[Liz] Wonderful. So, Gigi, given that you have experienced generational poverty
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in your own family, what are some of the differences that you've seen
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compared to the typical middle-class outlook?
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[Gigi] Okay. Let's divide this up because it's so big.
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Let's just look at the home first.
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And I'll contrast this with middle-class homes.
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But in generational poverty, the home itself can give us a lot of clues.
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For example, in generational poverty, instability and crowded housing is frequent.
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You might have six people living in a two-bedroom mobile home.
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That's not that uncommon.
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Outside the home, the yard doesn't necessarily have new flowers planted, or bushes.
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The yard is not typically maintained, unless, you know,
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you just have to mow that grass or get kicked out.
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There's usually in generational poverty not a lot of decor on the walls.
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Furniture sometimes is leftover, or it's free,
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or there's not a lot of money spent on furniture.
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And sometimes I know that, from my mother's point of view,
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we used to make bookshelves from concrete blocks and old pieces of wood,
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and that was a big part of my furniture in my room when I was a kid.
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Also, in the home of people of generational poverty usually a TV is on.
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Maybe a radio. There's often a lot of background noise.
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And, if you'll notice, people of poverty tend to speak at a higher volume
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than people of middle class. And that's because of crowded housing
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and a lot of distractions going on in the house.
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Within the house itself, for the people that live there,
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in generational poverty, personal space is very hard to come by.
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I know, in my home, with my children, we all have our personal rooms.
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Each of my three children has his or her own room.
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I have my chair. I have my certain cup for coffee,
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a certain cup for my iced tea, and I have private spaces with boundaries.
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So do my children. We don't get into each other's space.
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You won't find that in generational poverty. Things are very often shared,
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and there's no such thing as a "personal space."
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Everybody uses that same coffee cup.
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Everybody might use the same dresser.
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Of course, in generational poverty, in homes,
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you probably will see limited possessions by people of poverty.
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And there's a reason for that.
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One of the reasons is that people of poverty tend to move a lot,
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whereas people of middle class don't move so much.
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So, it's easier to fill a middle-class garage
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with a lot of junk and nice furniture in the homes
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knowing that you may not be moving for 10 or 20 years.
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But for a rental, you don't take a lot of time
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to paint the walls and do the trim.
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And as far as possession goes, of course, you're not gonna have
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as many possessions because you don't have as much money.
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Children often have no bath or bedtime ritual,
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and so they're missing that kind of structure.
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There could be a lot of reasons for that.
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First of all, there's a lot of people in the home.
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Could be that the mother is working at night
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or have other things to take care of instead
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of a very precise structure or bath or bedtime rituals.
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Children from poverty often get free lunches,
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and sometimes take-home lunches.
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Thank goodness, we do that!
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Children of poverty might struggle with self-esteem,
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because they look around at the middle-class friends, and their classmates.
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There's got to be a little feelings of
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"I don't have that. Maybe they're better than I."
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Or perhaps the middle-class children say,
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"Look how good I am! I have new Nike sneakers!"
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Also, in poverty older children often take the place as parents,
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feeding and caring for the younger children.
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Speaking of the older people in the home,
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let's talk about the stereotypical male/female roles.
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Unlike middle class, people of poverty generally follow a matriarchal structure.
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And it matters who your mother is.
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The mother is often the provider and nurturer.
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And so that's where you get the idea of a great insult is
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one that says "yo, yo mama!" But you don't mess with somebody's mama!
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Mama is often the most precious person in the house.
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Males, on the other hand, can kind of come and go in generational poverty.
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Oftentimes, men and women will not marry each other.
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They could get more benefits sometimes without the marriage.
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And what is marriage for?
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Because if you have to break up, that's going to cost a lot of money.
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So, that whole legal thing with marriage and partnership
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is not usually recognized in poverty.
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Males are seen frequently as the lovers and the fighters.
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And if you'll notice, in poverty there's often talk of violence:
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I'm gonna cut you! I'm gonna hit you!
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I'm gonna beat your butt, you know, kind of thing.
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While you may hear middle-class kids say that, as well,
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you'll see it more often among poverty.
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Just like you'll see the idea of spanking and corporal punishment
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geared more into poverty rather than middle-class.
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It's interesting how people of poverty think of their relationships.
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Sometimes they see people as their possessions.
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I have a very good friend who comes from poverty,
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and she even gets a little jealous
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if I'm with another friend because I am her friend.
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But that's very common—very possessive relationships.
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But then again, family is very, very important to people of poverty.
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So frequently, a college student will tell me I have to miss class.
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I'm going to take my mother to the doctor.
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Or my brother has to go to such and such.
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And I often think, "Well, can't your mother go to the doctor herself?
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Or your brother go wherever?"
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But there's that closeness.
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My friend from poverty always says, "The most crowded hospital rooms,
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and most visitors in prisons, are from people of poverty,
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because if one person's there, families and friends are so close, they all go to visit.
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Typically, in poverty men socialize mostly with men, and women with women.
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You'll see that more frequently than in middle class.
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As far as the individuals go, in poverty your personality is much more significant
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than it is within middle class.
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To have a good personality, especially a sense of humor, is great
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because entertainment is so important to people of poverty.
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In fact, their motivators often are family and entertainment.
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If you ask, "What's an ideal day for a person of poverty?"
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It's usually gonna be something like hanging out with my friends and family.
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Maybe playing video games. Or going to a movie.
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Or watching a movie. Or just somehow being entertained.
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Because poverty often results in very crowded housing,
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there sometimes isn't as strong a connection as you might see in middle class,
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where mom and dad might sit down with the two kids every night for dinner.
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So that in poverty you sometimes will see gangs being very appealing because it's a
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part of a community that one might join outside of the crowded home.
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So, with that, shall we move on to middle class?
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Let's see how that's different.
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So, in middle class the home itself, well, if you can see on this slide,
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it looks like the yard is "yard of the month."
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You don't see those awards going into poor neighborhoods.
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There's usually a orderliness and a cleanliness.
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If we go inside the home, we're likely to see a garage
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that has tools up hanging on the wall, or tool chests.
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And you go inside, there's calendars reminding people of appointments and practices.
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There's shoe racks in the closets, and winter clothes on the top rack.
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It's going to be usually pretty well organized.
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Lots of home decor.
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Knickknacks that, "Look," poverty would think, "Why are you spending money on that?"
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A person of poverty may be used to getting utilities turned off.
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But in the middle-class home, if you have a storm and your electricity goes out
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for an hour, people of middle class tend to panic.
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Can't imagine living without electricity for more than two hours!
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We go into the kitchen.
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And the kitchen generally is well stocked with good foods often times.
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In poverty, the quantity of food is important.
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In middle class, the quality of food is important.
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So, you'll see different product brands in each kitchen, in each home.
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Usually, like in this home that we're looking at, there's probably a bedroom
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for each individual that lives in that home, and I bet it's not too overcrowded.
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We're probably talking about four to five people live in this home,
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and it looks plenty big enough for them.
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In terms of the children, children of middle class often have after-school activities,
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dance lessons, sports, gymnastics—those kind of things.
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Whereas, children of poverty don't usually get involved in after-school activities.
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Oftentimes there's a cost for that.
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Children of middle-class families usually get to have themed birthday parties.
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I remember some of the themes my children had.
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I think we had "Batman" once. And "Little Princess."
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Oh yeah, we did the "Little Pony" themed birthday party once.
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You don't see that for children of poverty too much.
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And, not only do children have their own themed birthday parties,
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but they're frequently going to other people's birthday parties.
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And getting a gift that looks like it costs a decent amount is a good thing.
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People of poverty may not be able to bring a gift when they attend the party.
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I know we had a few parties, where a child couldn't bring a gift.
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I remember one in particular—didn't want to take the goody bag at the end
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because she hadn't brought anything.
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I think I ended up giving her six goody bags!
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Children raised in a house like this probably get new outfits.
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They go shopping before school starts for this year's new clothes.
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They get new outfits for Christmas, or Easter.
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Again, children in poverty don't have that.
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Stereotypically, male and female roles are quite different in middle class.
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Although this is getting to be a little old-fashioned.
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But, at least up until about 2000, we saw the male as the provider generally,
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and the mother more as a nurturer.
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And yes, we know those stereotypical roles are starting to give way,
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but they still hold a little weight.
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Usually parents in a home from middle class are very protective.
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They want to know, if their children is going to go to a party,
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who's giving it? Who's gonna be there?
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I know that, when my own kids were gonna spend the night,
00:16:14.560 --> 00:16:17.760
I'd always have to call the mom. I want to know more.
00:16:17.760 --> 00:16:22.410
When I taught this class, actually, one of the journal entry questions was,
00:16:22.410 --> 00:16:27.720
"If you come from middle class, and your child gets invited to sleep at a home,
00:16:27.720 --> 00:16:32.350
for somebody that lives in a maybe not-so-healthy neighborhood,
00:16:32.350 --> 00:16:35.870
that you're concerned about, do you let them spend the night or not?"
00:16:35.870 --> 00:16:37.850
It's a tough question for some of us.
00:16:37.850 --> 00:16:41.500
And I had that issue come up with my own children.
00:16:41.500 --> 00:16:46.690
So, I did let her spend the night. But we called and talked frequently.
00:16:46.690 --> 00:16:50.390
And then, the little girl came and spent the night at our house frequently.
00:16:50.390 --> 00:16:54.180
And it was very interesting to watch the interaction between the two.
00:16:54.180 --> 00:16:59.230
The little girl from poverty was so intrigued with our refrigerator and what was in it.
00:16:59.230 --> 00:17:02.019
Anyway, the stereotypical roles.
00:17:02.019 --> 00:17:07.269
It's the people from middle class who generally join the PTA, or other organizations.
00:17:07.269 --> 00:17:10.399
Soccer moms—they tend to go with their kids,
00:17:10.399 --> 00:17:15.189
or at least go to their games on the weekends, if they're into sports.
00:17:15.189 --> 00:17:21.900
People of middle class tend to follow sports teams, have flags (?), and even college teams.
00:17:21.900 --> 00:17:26.169
People of poverty don't follow the colleges quite as much.
00:17:26.169 --> 00:17:30.299
Usually there's a connection to the college that you might have gone to.
00:17:30.299 --> 00:17:33.730
In the middle-class home, family reputation is very important.
00:17:33.730 --> 00:17:38.799
It is not uncommon to hear a person of middle class say to their children,
00:17:38.799 --> 00:17:41.249
you know, "Don't embarrass me."
00:17:41.249 --> 00:17:45.429
And, finally, I want to say that it seems that, in middle class,
00:17:45.429 --> 00:17:48.960
socialization occurs between men and women mixed.
00:17:48.960 --> 00:17:53.039
Now individually, people of middle class often have hobbies.
00:17:53.039 --> 00:17:57.100
You don't find that very often with people of poverty.
00:17:57.100 --> 00:18:02.690
People of middle class often enjoy outdoor activities: biking, kayaking, hiking.
00:18:02.690 --> 00:18:08.909
Again, you don't find people of poverty able to do very many of those things.
00:18:08.909 --> 00:18:14.340
In the middle-class home, individuals expect and feel entitled to privacy:
00:18:14.340 --> 00:18:21.269
"How dare you go into my special drawer?!" Or, "How dare you open my diary?!"
00:18:21.269 --> 00:18:27.230
We are so boundary-bound, whereas people of poverty don't have that.
00:18:27.230 --> 00:18:34.600
The last thing I want to mention about individuals in middle class is that reciprocity is common.
00:18:34.600 --> 00:18:38.330
If the family that lives in this house had the neighbors over for dinner,
00:18:38.330 --> 00:18:43.860
it's kind of expected that the neighbors are going to have them for dinner another time.
00:18:43.860 --> 00:18:48.070
That reciprocity you don't see so often with poverty.
00:18:48.070 --> 00:18:50.960
A person of this home might, you know, send a...
00:18:50.960 --> 00:18:54.429
in my neighborhood, it's give each other little Christmas gifts.
00:18:54.429 --> 00:18:57.690
One of the neighbors bakes cookies and brings them all around.
00:18:57.690 --> 00:19:01.220
I felt bad. I felt like I had to do something. I'm into reciprocity.
00:19:01.220 --> 00:19:05.369
So, I started giving little poinsettias to my neighbors.
00:19:05.369 --> 00:19:08.440
But you wouldn't tend to see that too much in poverty.
00:19:08.440 --> 00:19:14.789
So, that kind of sums up what home and family life and how they are different, I think.
00:19:14.789 --> 00:19:19.070
Now, let's take a look at money and health.
00:19:19.070 --> 00:19:23.600
In generational poverty the poverty trap on this slide shows you
00:19:23.600 --> 00:19:28.279
there's low economic growth, low saving, low-income.
00:19:28.279 --> 00:19:32.649
People of poverty tend to spend money quickly.
00:19:32.649 --> 00:19:37.600
They spend it immediately, because if they don't, it could be gone for something else.
00:19:37.600 --> 00:19:40.700
And money is so important to have at certain times,
00:19:40.700 --> 00:19:44.659
but savings is very hard to do when you're poor.
00:19:44.659 --> 00:19:49.200
People of poverty tend to spend a lot of money at certain times of the year,
00:19:49.200 --> 00:19:50.749
for example, around Christmas.
00:19:50.749 --> 00:19:53.950
My friend I was telling you about, who possesses me as a friend,
00:19:53.950 --> 00:20:00.350
in November she went to ask the bank to borrow money, based on her income tax refund
00:20:00.350 --> 00:20:04.940
she will get in January and February, so she could buy her kids Christmas presents.
00:20:04.940 --> 00:20:08.540
Also people of poverty tend to spend a whole lot at the beginning of the month
00:20:08.540 --> 00:20:12.529
when they get their money, and then, you know, by two, three weeks in,
00:20:12.529 --> 00:20:16.499
that's when they'll hit the food banks a lot more often.
00:20:16.499 --> 00:20:18.970
People of poverty tend not to have credit cards.
00:20:18.970 --> 00:20:23.739
And unfortunately, we capitalists are predators for the poor.
00:20:23.739 --> 00:20:29.750
We offer them crazy lottery tickets, that "you know, I'm gonna hit it one, you know."
00:20:29.750 --> 00:20:33.499
Eighty dollars later, there goes the electric bill money.
00:20:33.499 --> 00:20:35.679
You still haven't made anything.
00:20:35.679 --> 00:20:40.690
Pawn shops are strategically placed in poor areas, so you can pawn.
00:20:40.690 --> 00:20:42.869
Loan advances, cheque advances.
00:20:42.869 --> 00:20:47.760
Again, you'll find more of them in areas of poverty.
00:20:47.760 --> 00:20:51.460
In terms of health, people of poverty...well, first of all,
00:20:51.460 --> 00:20:53.429
it could very well be food insecure.
00:20:53.429 --> 00:20:59.519
So, nutrition isn't a top priority. "Not being hungry" is the priority.
00:20:59.519 --> 00:21:03.080
Whether or not it's got a lot of vitamin A or C in it doesn't matter.
00:21:03.080 --> 00:21:05.860
You just want..., people of poverty want not to be hungry.
00:21:05.860 --> 00:21:11.260
So, they often eat foods that are inexpensive and not necessarily so good for you.
00:21:11.260 --> 00:21:14.629
And I think of times when I've been in situational poverty myself,
00:21:14.629 --> 00:21:18.710
we tended to eat a lot of ramen noodles, mac and cheese.
00:21:18.710 --> 00:21:20.559
You know, the vegetables would have been nice,
00:21:20.559 --> 00:21:23.979
but when I can get three boxes of mac and cheese for a buck,
00:21:23.979 --> 00:21:30.809
or a pack of apples for $3.99, I can afford the mac and cheese better.
00:21:30.809 --> 00:21:34.539
Healthwise people of poverty are often exposed to addiction,
00:21:34.539 --> 00:21:40.149
not that people the middle class are not, and in fact, the opioid crisis gets everyone.
00:21:40.149 --> 00:21:47.320
But unfortunately, poverty lends itself well to substance abuse and addiction.
00:21:47.320 --> 00:21:51.700
People of poverty often smoke cigarettes. I think that's an adult kind of thing.
00:21:51.700 --> 00:21:56.020
You see a lot of younger teenagers in poverty trying to smoke cigarettes.
00:21:56.020 --> 00:22:00.110
We don't see that as much, I don't know what the percentages are, but...
00:22:00.110 --> 00:22:05.169
I think people of poverty may be vulnerable to sexual predators.
00:22:05.169 --> 00:22:11.049
Again, that doesn't mean people of middle class aren't also vulnerable to sexual predators,
00:22:11.049 --> 00:22:17.289
but because of cousins moving in, and crowded housing, and very little private space,
00:22:17.289 --> 00:22:22.720
the sexual predators have an easier time getting what they want.
00:22:22.720 --> 00:22:26.859
People of poverty don't usually go for annual physical exams.
00:22:26.859 --> 00:22:30.009
And they have undiagnosed physical problems.
00:22:30.009 --> 00:22:35.779
Could be diabetic, could have heart disease, and so on, and not know that.
00:22:35.779 --> 00:22:39.450
Usually when people of poverty are sick, they'll go to the ER.
00:22:39.450 --> 00:22:44.919
Dentist visits are rare, and they're usually for extractions, not preventative,
00:22:44.919 --> 00:22:49.559
because, of course, people of poverty don't usually have insurance.
00:22:49.559 --> 00:22:52.910
And unless it's very life-threatening, people of poverty
00:22:52.910 --> 00:22:57.109
don't usually have surgeries unless they absolutely have to.
00:22:57.109 --> 00:23:00.500
Whereas, if we move on to people of middle class,
00:23:00.500 --> 00:23:06.059
people of middle class tend to want to manage their money, perhaps save money.
00:23:06.059 --> 00:23:12.119
Oh, I should also mention people of poverty tend to give more to charity, and more frequently.
00:23:12.119 --> 00:23:15.419
They're not giving as much, but they do give.
00:23:15.419 --> 00:23:19.919
Last Christmas I remember there was a Salvation Army worker asking for money.
00:23:19.919 --> 00:23:23.179
And I came out of a store, and I looked, and I only had 20s.
00:23:23.179 --> 00:23:27.229
I was going to give him something and I thought, "No, I'm not giving you the 20."
00:23:27.229 --> 00:23:31.479
I walked by and this homeless person came up and put a few dollars in.
00:23:31.479 --> 00:23:37.249
Boy, did I feel awful. I should have gone back and given him the 20, but...
00:23:37.249 --> 00:23:41.700
People of middle-class tend not to give money to family and friends.
00:23:41.700 --> 00:23:47.590
They'll give to charity, but very regulated, and tax-deductible usually.
00:23:47.590 --> 00:23:50.909
People of middle class don't talk about how much they make usually.
00:23:50.909 --> 00:23:53.379
That's kind of taboo.
00:23:53.379 --> 00:23:56.539
And people in the middle class generally have credit card debt.
00:23:56.539 --> 00:24:01.190
And they have car payments. Whereas, people of poverty don't.
00:24:01.190 --> 00:24:06.099
In terms of health, people of middle class often get regular dental cleanings.
00:24:06.099 --> 00:24:10.520
They take prescribed medicines because they go to their doctor every year,
00:24:10.520 --> 00:24:14.190
and they keep up with all of their health issues.
00:24:14.190 --> 00:24:18.239
People of middle class may or may not exercise, but they're more likely
00:24:18.239 --> 00:24:23.909
to understand the importance of diet and exercise for feeling good.
00:24:23.909 --> 00:24:28.940
People of poverty don't usually look at how the diet or exercise
00:24:28.940 --> 00:24:36.119
affects them as individuals. The focus is more on: "will we have enough to eat tonight?"
00:24:36.119 --> 00:24:42.009
People of middle class in terms of "health" tend to go to counseling for stress,
00:24:42.009 --> 00:24:47.639
for marriage issues, for raising teenagers. They go see therapists.
00:24:47.639 --> 00:24:50.840
People of poverty usually don't have that support,
00:24:50.840 --> 00:24:55.081
and they tend to deal with those issues by themselves, which is sad to me,
00:24:55.081 --> 00:25:00.139
because I can't imagine the stress of not being able to feed your family.
00:25:00.139 --> 00:25:04.119
Okay. And let's look into one other little area
00:25:04.119 --> 00:25:09.739
for the differences between generational poverty in education and jobs.
00:25:09.739 --> 00:25:16.139
So, if we look at people of poverty, well, a job is usually "just a job."
00:25:16.139 --> 00:25:20.399
They are often under-employed or unemployed.
00:25:20.399 --> 00:25:24.120
Children of poverty can be just as smart as people of middle class.
00:25:24.120 --> 00:25:30.720
But there has been some research lately to suggest the more generations one is in poverty,
00:25:30.720 --> 00:25:33.109
the more it affects our brain's potential.
00:25:33.109 --> 00:25:38.570
So, I don't know where we're going with that I'd like to see more about that study.
00:25:38.570 --> 00:25:42.039
But I know that people of poverty will generally do well
00:25:42.039 --> 00:25:45.059
if they like the teacher or their boss.
00:25:45.059 --> 00:25:48.499
That connection, that relationship is very important.
00:25:48.499 --> 00:25:51.789
If the child thinks the teacher doesn't like him or her,
00:25:51.789 --> 00:25:56.539
they tend not to want to please that teacher, so they don't do as well.
00:25:56.539 --> 00:26:03.559
If, on the job, when the boss man or boss woman gets a little irritable,
00:26:03.559 --> 00:26:07.779
the person of poverty may take it personally and tend to quit.
00:26:07.779 --> 00:26:11.169
So, it really matters about that relationship.
00:26:11.169 --> 00:26:17.519
Of course, people of poverty tend to lack higher education, so their jobs are limited.
00:26:17.519 --> 00:26:21.599
And one more thing I'd like to mention about education and jobs is language.
00:26:21.599 --> 00:26:24.690
I feel that this is so important.
00:26:24.690 --> 00:26:29.249
People of poverty tend to speak in "casual register,"
00:26:29.249 --> 00:26:33.440
where people of middle class tend to speak in more "formal register."
00:26:33.440 --> 00:26:38.659
This can be very difficult, because all of our tests, our schools,
00:26:38.659 --> 00:26:44.919
our job applications, our legal documentation is all in formal register.
00:26:44.919 --> 00:26:48.359
Casual register is the kind of talk you might have with friends,
00:26:48.359 --> 00:26:51.409
like, "Hey bro! What's up? How's it going?"
00:26:51.409 --> 00:27:00.229
People in poverty use casual register which contains limited vocabulary and lacks structure.
00:27:00.229 --> 00:27:06.360
If I were to tell you, Liz, about Jack and Jill going up the hill to get some water,
00:27:06.360 --> 00:27:10.769
if I'm telling it to you in casual register, I might start with Jack and Jill
00:27:10.769 --> 00:27:16.299
at the top of the hill, and Jack falling down. Oh yeah, they had gone up for water.
00:27:16.299 --> 00:27:19.570
The order of the story is very different.
00:27:19.570 --> 00:27:22.210
It's often interactive, where I might say,
00:27:22.210 --> 00:27:26.309
"Do you know Jack? Do y'know Jack went up? Did you know Jack fell down that hill?
00:27:26.309 --> 00:27:28.770
Yeah, he went with Jill to get some water."
00:27:28.770 --> 00:27:33.919
Okay, that's casual register. Lacks structure. A limited vocabulary development.
00:27:33.919 --> 00:27:39.989
And doesn't seem quite as organized. Can often also repeat themselves in casual register.
00:27:39.989 --> 00:27:46.729
So, if we flip over to middle class and look at these same two topics, education and jobs,
00:27:46.729 --> 00:27:51.799
you can see that in middle class, work and achievement are the motivators.
00:27:51.799 --> 00:27:56.429
As with...in poverty it is entertainment and relationships.
00:27:56.429 --> 00:28:00.549
In education, what drives people usually is work and achievement.
00:28:00.549 --> 00:28:03.249
We ask our little ones, "What are you going to be when you grow up?"
00:28:03.249 --> 00:28:07.909
You see? You're just constantly gearing them to be good workers.
00:28:07.909 --> 00:28:11.379
"Did you get A's on your report card?"
00:28:11.379 --> 00:28:13.879
For people of middle class, that's very important.
00:28:13.879 --> 00:28:17.460
Attending the A-B Honor Roll ceremony, and things like that.
00:28:17.460 --> 00:28:22.570
Whereas, people of poverty tend to be left out of those things frequently.
00:28:22.570 --> 00:28:26.500
And it's not because they can't do it.
00:28:26.500 --> 00:28:31.100
In education, kids, and I'm sure if any of you teachers are listening,
00:28:31.100 --> 00:28:35.480
you know that children of poverty tend to forget to bring their homework.
00:28:35.480 --> 00:28:38.710
They forget to have their moms sign anything.
00:28:38.710 --> 00:28:43.450
Or they remember that a big project is due the night before, and all of a sudden,
00:28:43.450 --> 00:28:46.489
they need a project board, and the mom has no money to go out
00:28:46.489 --> 00:28:49.249
and buy the project board (or mom or dad).
00:28:49.249 --> 00:28:54.960
So, in schools you'll see people of poverty have very different needs.
00:28:54.960 --> 00:28:58.909
One of the reasons: it's not that the child of poverty is so forgetful,
00:28:58.909 --> 00:29:01.820
but there's not a ritual. There's not a ritual to say,
00:29:01.820 --> 00:29:06.590
"What did you do in school today? What did you learn? Do you have any homework?"
00:29:06.590 --> 00:29:08.919
That is kind of left out in poverty.
00:29:08.919 --> 00:29:13.919
So, in middle-class, work and achievement, and we start them young,
00:29:13.919 --> 00:29:19.479
trying to get them geared toward that way, especially to be career-minded,
00:29:19.479 --> 00:29:21.989
we emphasize the importance of education.
00:29:21.989 --> 00:29:27.229
And now, people of poverty also understand education is important, and they revere it,
00:29:27.229 --> 00:29:31.599
but it is not such a thing that they're tied to as much
00:29:31.599 --> 00:29:34.409
because people of poverty are looking for food.
00:29:34.409 --> 00:29:38.580
They're looking for jobs. They're figuring out ways to pay the bill, and so on.
00:29:38.580 --> 00:29:44.980
In the middle class, formal register is usually spoken where we try to expand our vocabulary.
00:29:44.980 --> 00:29:50.480
We tend to structure our language in a way that uses bigger words when we can.
00:29:50.480 --> 00:29:57.289
And, to tell a story, we usually do it chronologically, or have some other organizing principle.
00:29:57.289 --> 00:30:03.539
In my own family I mentioned that some of my family took on the norms of generational poverty.
00:30:03.539 --> 00:30:07.639
And I can tell you that, like my brother, Mark, he lives in poverty.
00:30:07.639 --> 00:30:12.619
And he speaks casual register. And I can see the differences.
00:30:12.619 --> 00:30:16.270
When Mark tells a story, I might have been able to tell you that same story
00:30:16.270 --> 00:30:22.320
in five minutes or less. But Mark dramatizes the whole thing, and it's very entertaining.
00:30:22.320 --> 00:30:27.080
You'd much rather hear the story from him than from me. But that's one of the differences.
00:30:27.080 --> 00:30:32.309
I can't emphasize that enough, because I also have a son-in-law who comes from poverty,
00:30:32.309 --> 00:30:37.389
and he comes from rural North Carolina. He's got a very strong southern accent.
00:30:37.389 --> 00:30:42.830
And he uses words that make me cringe a few times, like ain't, and you'uns, and...
00:30:42.830 --> 00:30:45.210
but that's okay, because that's what makes him unique.
00:30:45.210 --> 00:30:48.249
But I don't think it helps him get a job.
00:30:48.249 --> 00:30:53.500
[Liz] So, let's talk about some of the philosophical kind of ideas
00:30:53.500 --> 00:30:58.679
or the philosophical outlook that differs between people in generational poverty
00:30:58.679 --> 00:31:02.309
versus the middle-class kind of philosophy outlook.
00:31:02.309 --> 00:31:03.889
What are some of those key characteristics?
00:31:03.889 --> 00:31:09.169
[Gigi] Well, you know I'm going to say this in terms of what I see
00:31:09.169 --> 00:31:12.599
within my own family and friends who come from poverty.
00:31:12.599 --> 00:31:16.350
It seems that the things that characterizes them is
00:31:16.350 --> 00:31:20.539
"not taking control and responsibility of their own life."
00:31:20.539 --> 00:31:24.269
They tend to see life in terms of "they're a victim."
00:31:24.269 --> 00:31:28.669
"Look what happened to me. Either I have bad luck or it's God's will,
00:31:28.669 --> 00:31:34.330
but these things are out of my control, and they keep happening to me."
00:31:34.330 --> 00:31:40.029
So, if you mix those driving forces of relationships and entertainment,
00:31:40.029 --> 00:31:43.240
it goes well with that victimization.
00:31:43.240 --> 00:31:48.899
If something good happens to you, it's good luck rather than "How did I do that myself?"
00:31:48.899 --> 00:31:53.360
I remember once, my brother and I (My parents had eight children.)
00:31:53.360 --> 00:31:55.549
and my brother was held back twice.
00:31:55.549 --> 00:31:59.350
And so, he was only one year older than me, and we were in middle school together.
00:31:59.350 --> 00:32:03.919
And I was doing very well at school and I had gotten A-B Honor Roll.
00:32:03.919 --> 00:32:07.889
And so, we got to go to a ceremony at the end of the school year in the gym.
00:32:07.889 --> 00:32:11.119
And my dad had to work, but my mom was there.
00:32:11.119 --> 00:32:15.919
And my brother, for the first time in his life, had also made the A-B Honor Roll.
00:32:15.919 --> 00:32:18.989
And he was so proud of himself! We sat with my mom.
00:32:18.989 --> 00:32:22.779
And then, you know, when they called our names, we both went up and got our certificate.
00:32:22.779 --> 00:32:27.330
And I remember coming home, and my dad asking my brother,
00:32:27.330 --> 00:32:31.259
"What did he do differently to be on the A-B Honor Roll?"
00:32:31.259 --> 00:32:35.149
And he said, "The teacher just likes me better." Ha!
00:32:35.149 --> 00:32:37.919
And then my dad said, "What did I do to be on the A-B Honor Roll?"
00:32:37.919 --> 00:32:40.000
And I said, "Well, I did my homework."
00:32:40.000 --> 00:32:44.190
So, you can see a very big difference, in that I didn't think I was a victim.
00:32:44.190 --> 00:32:48.139
I had control over: if I want to be on the A-B Honor Roll, I will!
00:32:48.139 --> 00:32:50.450
For my brother, it was a matter of luck.
00:32:50.450 --> 00:32:56.029
Another thing I notice with people of poverty for "philosophy" is that they tend
00:32:56.029 --> 00:32:59.799
to focus more on the present, than people of middle class.
00:32:59.799 --> 00:33:04.799
Through all the mindfulness and things we middle-class people do to relieve stress,
00:33:04.799 --> 00:33:08.419
or to be in the present moment, you know, for people of poverty
00:33:08.419 --> 00:33:14.039
that comes a little more easily, because the future is a concern and a big question mark.
00:33:14.039 --> 00:33:17.590
"How are we gonna get through?" I know that's true for my brother.
00:33:17.590 --> 00:33:23.440
So, just focusing on day to day, he gets so excited about the springtime, and the leaves
00:33:23.440 --> 00:33:29.099
coming on the trees, and the flowers blooming, so much more, probably than I do because,
00:33:29.099 --> 00:33:33.999
if you ask me to close my eyes for 30 seconds and notice what I'm thinking,
00:33:33.999 --> 00:33:36.710
my thoughts are usually on the future.
00:33:36.710 --> 00:33:41.080
And I know that, for my brother, Mark, it's very much on the present.
00:33:41.080 --> 00:33:45.729
Fate plays a big role for people of poverty and I think I mentioned that:
00:33:45.729 --> 00:33:52.789
that goes along with victimization. It's in my fate. It's in my cards to struggle in this life.
00:33:52.789 --> 00:33:59.049
Or it was fate that we met. Or that my car had a flat tire today.
00:33:59.049 --> 00:34:04.489
Rather than, "Wow, my car had a flat tire because I haven't checked on the tires in a while."
00:34:04.489 --> 00:34:10.080
Yeah, you don't think it's anything outside of my control. But that was my perspective.
00:34:10.080 --> 00:34:16.890
People of poverty tend also to dramatize things or openly display feelings.
00:34:16.890 --> 00:34:19.150
Emotion often trumps reason.
00:34:19.150 --> 00:34:23.710
And so, again, I was in a hospital waiting room once. One of my brothers was dying.
00:34:23.710 --> 00:34:28.679
And we were in a large waiting room. There was another big family there.
00:34:28.679 --> 00:34:31.940
It was a lot of people waiting to hear the word
00:34:31.940 --> 00:34:35.730
on one of their family members or friends who was there.
00:34:35.730 --> 00:34:40.220
And when the doctor came in and told them that their family member had passed,
00:34:40.220 --> 00:34:45.149
the crying, and the misery—it was a shock, I'm sure.
00:34:45.149 --> 00:34:48.450
But many of them were emotionally losing control of themselves.
00:34:48.450 --> 00:34:53.860
I remember one woman could not walk out. They had to go get a wheelchair for her.
00:34:53.860 --> 00:34:58.570
Interestingly, and sadly, my brother also died that night.
00:34:58.570 --> 00:35:03.170
And there were probably six of us family members there in that waiting room.
00:35:03.170 --> 00:35:08.490
And, when the doctor came and told us, I noticed how different the response was.
00:35:08.490 --> 00:35:11.880
We sadly had a few tears fall, and we left.
00:35:11.880 --> 00:35:16.220
We didn't stay there with everyone else, like the other family had done.
00:35:16.220 --> 00:35:19.700
So, that was very different.
00:35:19.700 --> 00:35:23.590
People of poverty are usually more comfortable with people like themselves.
00:35:23.590 --> 00:35:28.250
And I would say probably the same is true for middle-class, although you'll see
00:35:28.250 --> 00:35:33.190
middle-class bumper stickers trying to celebrate diversity a little more.
00:35:33.190 --> 00:35:39.540
Also, people of poverty tend to really stick so much with people like them.
00:35:39.540 --> 00:35:41.770
And let me give you an example.
00:35:41.770 --> 00:35:47.660
If you can relate to...maybe it might be a Hispanic neighborhood that lives in poverty,
00:35:47.660 --> 00:35:50.860
but you have that common feeling with Hispanics,
00:35:50.860 --> 00:35:54.800
so you feel good around Hispanic people of poverty.
00:35:54.800 --> 00:35:59.410
Whereas, if you go to visit, let's say, a well-to-do neighborhood
00:35:59.410 --> 00:36:03.160
where some Spanish people live, they're not so comfortable.
00:36:03.160 --> 00:36:09.320
Middle-class, you tend to be more comfortable in any of those.
00:36:09.320 --> 00:36:13.780
People of generational poverty also have extreme freedom of speech,
00:36:13.780 --> 00:36:17.560
and sometimes we could be a little stunned by what they say.
00:36:17.560 --> 00:36:21.100
Sometimes I can't believe my brother said that to me. Ha!
00:36:21.100 --> 00:36:24.530
I remember when we were younger, even sexual things!
00:36:24.530 --> 00:36:29.250
He tends to want to tell all details! I don't want to hear that!
00:36:29.250 --> 00:36:33.510
To me that's a taboo! You don't talk about those kind of things!
00:36:33.510 --> 00:36:39.500
And lastly, in generational poverty I think there's a philosophy about this "system."
00:36:39.500 --> 00:36:46.620
And by that I'm talking about the police, the fire department, our local 211's or 911's.
00:36:46.620 --> 00:36:50.100
People of poverty tend not to trust the system.
00:36:50.100 --> 00:36:54.250
You might see family abuse going on, and no one calls the police,
00:36:54.250 --> 00:36:57.180
because you don't want to call attention to anything.
00:36:57.180 --> 00:36:59.630
Could be Uncle Joe is there and he's drunk,
00:36:59.630 --> 00:37:06.420
or maybe cousin Sue has a court order for her arrest, or something. You just tend not to call.
00:37:06.420 --> 00:37:11.120
Whereas, in middle class, people tend to depend on that system,
00:37:11.120 --> 00:37:13.860
and use that system for protection.
00:37:13.860 --> 00:37:21.090
For people of poverty, they don't see police as protectors. So, it's a very different world view.
00:37:21.090 --> 00:37:23.920
And in middle class, you probably already know this, but in middle class
00:37:23.920 --> 00:37:28.890
the unspoken philosophy is that you "create your own reality."
00:37:28.890 --> 00:37:31.780
I know that's the bottom line of existentialism,
00:37:31.780 --> 00:37:34.780
but it seems to have infiltrated middle class, that:
00:37:34.780 --> 00:37:40.020
"We get what we deserve. We get what we work for. You work hard, you accomplish it."
00:37:40.020 --> 00:37:45.930
I don't think it's fair that we live in a world of meritocracy, and that being of a
00:37:45.930 --> 00:37:49.430
middle class makes you a better person than somebody of poverty,
00:37:49.430 --> 00:37:55.110
but we are so geared toward that, and we think people of poverty are not good enough
00:37:55.110 --> 00:37:59.830
because they didn't try hard enough. They're not trying to create their own reality.
00:37:59.830 --> 00:38:03.370
And unfortunately, that's the bad rap my brother gets often.
00:38:03.370 --> 00:38:08.490
The driving forces for people of middle class, I've mentioned, is "work and achievement."
00:38:08.490 --> 00:38:11.050
And there is a focus on the future.
00:38:11.050 --> 00:38:19.210
Violence is not very common, at least threats of violence not so common in the middle class.
00:38:19.210 --> 00:38:24.440
And people of middle class are often reserved about sharing their feelings.
00:38:24.440 --> 00:38:28.260
And they're more likely to, like I said, embrace diversity.
00:38:28.260 --> 00:38:31.460
Fate is up in the air with people of middle class.
00:38:31.460 --> 00:38:37.090
Some, of course, are big believers, and believe God controls, but ultimately,
00:38:37.090 --> 00:38:42.620
it's up to you as an individual to create the best life for yourself.
00:38:42.620 --> 00:38:48.930
In conversations, the people of poverty tend to talk about other people a lot.
00:38:48.930 --> 00:38:53.690
People of middle class tend to talk about "ideas" a little bit more.
00:38:53.690 --> 00:38:55.630
Oh, one other thing I didn't mention.
00:38:55.630 --> 00:38:58.430
The people of poverty are very locally concerned
00:38:58.430 --> 00:39:02.310
with their own neighborhood often, maybe even their own city.
00:39:02.310 --> 00:39:07.450
But people of middle class tend to be more nationally involved.
00:39:07.450 --> 00:39:10.710
I think it's always funny to see the "world news tonight"
00:39:10.710 --> 00:39:14.510
and it's really all about our nation. It's not really "world news."
00:39:14.510 --> 00:39:18.850
But the middle class tends to focus more on national ideas.
00:39:18.850 --> 00:39:22.540
Whereas, people of poverty: local ideas.
00:39:22.540 --> 00:39:28.020
And alternatively, people of wealth are more internationally minded.
00:39:28.020 --> 00:39:32.070
As I mentioned, the relationship with the system for people of middle class,
00:39:32.070 --> 00:39:37.140
they rely heavily on that system, and in fact, believe the system is made for them.
00:39:37.140 --> 00:39:41.920
[Liz] Thank you, Gigi. So, having discussed those things,
00:39:41.920 --> 00:39:46.250
if someone manages to get out of poverty and become economically middle class,
00:39:46.250 --> 00:39:51.130
will their outlook on values change based on their new socioeconomic status?
00:39:51.130 --> 00:39:54.450
Or do they carry some of that philosophy and outlook?
00:39:54.450 --> 00:39:59.150
[Gigi] Good question! Because generational poverty isn't just about money.
00:39:59.150 --> 00:40:02.720
If it was about money, we could probably do things to be more equal.
00:40:02.720 --> 00:40:06.670
(Well, I don't know. I don't know if we could in a capitalist society.)
00:40:06.670 --> 00:40:10.010
But generational poverty isn't about money.
00:40:10.010 --> 00:40:15.280
My brother and I came from the same, you might say, "lower middle class."
00:40:15.280 --> 00:40:18.280
It was in between poverty and middle class.
00:40:18.280 --> 00:40:23.760
But I think that for most people of poverty, there is not just a lack of money,
00:40:23.760 --> 00:40:26.460
or there may not even be a lack of money at all.
00:40:26.460 --> 00:40:29.650
And they still take on some of the norms of poverty.
00:40:29.650 --> 00:40:32.610
Some of the things that we also need to look at as teachers,
00:40:32.610 --> 00:40:35.500
and as instructors, people who work with the public:
00:40:35.500 --> 00:40:41.070
also know that people of poverty may be lacking in support systems.
00:40:41.070 --> 00:40:45.150
They may not have people to tutor them after school.
00:40:45.150 --> 00:40:49.940
They may not have the kind of health systems to be a part of that,
00:40:49.940 --> 00:40:55.080
you know, supporting healthy teeth and gums, and healthy bodies, and exercise.
00:40:55.080 --> 00:41:00.860
You know, not always are there support systems in place for people of poverty.
00:41:00.860 --> 00:41:03.670
Also, emotional resources are a big one.
00:41:03.670 --> 00:41:07.730
I think my mother had kind of a victim mentality.
00:41:07.730 --> 00:41:11.060
And I say that because I remember when she had breast cancer,
00:41:11.060 --> 00:41:15.040
one of my sisters told my mom, when she was going in for her radiation,
00:41:15.040 --> 00:41:20.500
to "help the radiation" by thinking of the radiation as little,
00:41:20.500 --> 00:41:24.380
like pac-men eating the cancer inside of her, and my mother responding
00:41:24.380 --> 00:41:28.780
"Oh, that's ridiculous! If science can't help me, nothin' I do is gonna help."
00:41:28.780 --> 00:41:32.320
So, I think my mother saw herself as a victim.
00:41:32.320 --> 00:41:36.320
It was God's fate, I guess, that she got cancer.
00:41:36.320 --> 00:41:39.590
But I know that my mother, too, was pretty dramatic.
00:41:39.590 --> 00:41:42.530
And when she got angry we would all run.
00:41:42.530 --> 00:41:49.130
Not that she was violent, but emotionally a lot of verbal vomit came out a lot of times.
00:41:49.130 --> 00:41:56.090
It was like, "Oh! Just hold your ears!" Because that's how mom learned to deal with life.
00:41:56.090 --> 00:42:02.700
My father was always on the quiet side. Emotionally he didn't show a whole lot.
00:42:02.700 --> 00:42:05.500
You know, if he got angry you might notice he was being irritable,
00:42:05.500 --> 00:42:08.370
but not at all like my mother.
00:42:08.370 --> 00:42:12.010
You definitely knew when she was happy, sad, you know.
00:42:12.010 --> 00:42:14.460
But she grew up during the Depression.
00:42:14.460 --> 00:42:18.460
And her father had died from alcoholism when she was young.
00:42:18.460 --> 00:42:20.500
So, her emotional responses...Her mother,
00:42:20.500 --> 00:42:26.230
her own mother, had to rely on the goodness of others and charity of others,
00:42:26.230 --> 00:42:29.350
really, to get through that that horrible time.
00:42:29.350 --> 00:42:34.330
So, emotionally I always felt like my mom maybe didn't have proper support systems
00:42:34.330 --> 00:42:39.000
for how to deal with things emotionally, so it came out as loud tears
00:42:39.000 --> 00:42:41.810
or it was always loud.
00:42:41.810 --> 00:42:45.620
So, there could be a lack of proper emotional resources
00:42:45.620 --> 00:42:50.200
or we might even talk about "emotional intelligence" here.
00:42:50.200 --> 00:42:53.050
Also, for people of poverty sometimes people who have
00:42:53.050 --> 00:42:58.830
mental or physical difficulties, challenges, may end up in poverty.
00:42:58.830 --> 00:43:04.480
Again, that's a facet that they are not being well supported in.
00:43:04.480 --> 00:43:11.560
People of poverty often don't have positive role models or relationships to look up to.
00:43:11.560 --> 00:43:15.330
And their dreams and aspirations are often limited.
00:43:15.330 --> 00:43:20.000
I remember reading a part from Ruby Payne's book, Understanding Generational Poverty.
00:43:20.000 --> 00:43:24.000
And she writes: People of poverty...if you ask the little kid
00:43:24.000 --> 00:43:26.080
what does he want to be when he grows up?
00:43:26.080 --> 00:43:31.150
Well, he's not exposed to the kind of people you might meet in a middle-class neighborhood:
00:43:31.150 --> 00:43:34.900
might be a radiologist, or a x-ray technician, or...
00:43:34.900 --> 00:43:38.480
They don't know about these things. Who are they dealing with?
00:43:38.480 --> 00:43:40.600
Social workers. Maybe teachers at school.
00:43:40.600 --> 00:43:44.130
But they don't know "I want to grow up and be a dental hygienist."
00:43:44.130 --> 00:43:46.730
Because chances are: they've never had a dental cleaning.
00:43:46.730 --> 00:43:50.190
So, their dreams and aspirations are often limited
00:43:50.190 --> 00:43:53.360
out of just not knowing, and not being exposed.
00:43:53.360 --> 00:43:57.360
So, when we get into middle class,
00:43:57.360 --> 00:44:02.050
middle class may also have some of these resources missing,
00:44:02.050 --> 00:44:07.960
but there's often support systems in place, that we are aware of,
00:44:07.960 --> 00:44:10.000
that will reach out and help us
00:44:10.000 --> 00:44:13.850
or is just a part of our life that we don't think that much of.
00:44:13.850 --> 00:44:16.260
[Liz] Thank you, Gigi.
00:44:16.260 --> 00:44:20.450
Let's also talk a little bit then about what each group can learn from each other,
00:44:20.450 --> 00:44:25.600
because as you've carefully shown, there are pluses and minuses to being from both groups.
00:44:25.600 --> 00:44:29.750
[Gigi] That's a great question, Liz. What can we learn?
00:44:29.750 --> 00:44:32.680
Certainly, we have a lot to learn from each other.
00:44:32.680 --> 00:44:37.900
I, at one time, married a man from Egypt in my younger days.
00:44:37.900 --> 00:44:41.010
We had a great relationship, for a while anyway!
00:44:41.010 --> 00:44:46.130
But learning about his culture was just so fascinating to me because I think I related
00:44:46.130 --> 00:44:52.880
it to my own family: that we actually had two cultures going on within our own family.
00:44:52.880 --> 00:44:58.000
And just like I can look at the Arab culture, and think, "Gawd, I wish we Americans
00:44:58.000 --> 00:45:03.280
maybe took better care of our elderly like my ex-husband's family did."
00:45:03.280 --> 00:45:06.520
We can also learn from people of poverty.
00:45:06.520 --> 00:45:10.280
What people of middle class can learn? Well, I don't know.
00:45:10.280 --> 00:45:15.710
Whenever I'm with my brother Mark, I love being in the present moment with him,
00:45:15.710 --> 00:45:18.720
where we can, you know, if he comes over, we walk around the yard.
00:45:18.720 --> 00:45:21.900
And we look at the things in the yard. And we look at the birds singing.
00:45:21.900 --> 00:45:23.580
And he's so much into this moment.
00:45:23.580 --> 00:45:26.110
He doesn't need to talk about what we're gonna be doing,
00:45:26.110 --> 00:45:29.400
you know, next weekend. Just be here now.
00:45:29.400 --> 00:45:33.110
So, I wish we middle-class people could learn from that.
00:45:33.110 --> 00:45:38.830
Also, the idea from poverty that your personality matters a lot, and in fact,
00:45:38.830 --> 00:45:43.720
is probably more important than acquisitions—any stuff you might accumulate.
00:45:43.720 --> 00:45:47.400
And certainly, my brother embodies that.
00:45:47.400 --> 00:45:52.430
He would much rather, he would say, have time with me at Christmas,
00:45:52.430 --> 00:45:54.570
than a thing I could give him.
00:45:54.570 --> 00:45:57.580
And I think we middle class people could learn from that.
00:45:57.580 --> 00:46:02.000
Also, I love Mark's nonconformity. Because he values his own personality,
00:46:02.000 --> 00:46:08.790
he carves a place out, and he fine-tunes this all the time about who he is.
00:46:08.790 --> 00:46:13.570
And it's definitely a nonconformist. But it works for him.
00:46:13.570 --> 00:46:15.400
And it didn't always work for him.
00:46:15.400 --> 00:46:19.110
In school, like I said, he was behind a couple of grades.
00:46:19.110 --> 00:46:23.720
Ha! According to him he had some teachers who didn't like him.
00:46:23.720 --> 00:46:28.070
But he learned to become a person that he is comfortable with,
00:46:28.070 --> 00:46:32.480
no matter what anybody else says. And I think that's a great lesson for us.
00:46:32.480 --> 00:46:35.820
Now, what can people of poverty learn?
00:46:35.820 --> 00:46:38.780
I wish that Mark didn't have a victim mentality.
00:46:38.780 --> 00:46:43.800
I wish that he saw that he can create his reality himself.
00:46:43.800 --> 00:46:47.450
The language distinctions: you know, for brother Mark, that worked OK.
00:46:47.450 --> 00:46:50.570
For son-in-law Shane, maybe not as much.
00:46:50.570 --> 00:46:57.250
I think that in American culture we are expected to use formal register most of the time,
00:46:57.250 --> 00:47:01.130
and that becomes problematic—the more generations one is in poverty.
00:47:01.130 --> 00:47:05.000
But trying to get people of poverty to expand their vocabulary
00:47:05.000 --> 00:47:08.320
and use some organization could be a good thing.
00:47:08.320 --> 00:47:12.080
And finally, the number one way out of poverty is education.
00:47:12.080 --> 00:47:16.020
And Mark says he's too old. Can't learn it now.
00:47:16.020 --> 00:47:19.440
But he wished he had gotten an education when he was younger.
00:47:19.440 --> 00:47:25.880
So, looking out for our education and our future and knowing how to pay that bill at
00:47:25.880 --> 00:47:30.320
the end of the month, being secure about that, is something we take for granted.
00:47:30.320 --> 00:47:34.430
But I wish that we could all, at least brother Mark, participate
00:47:34.430 --> 00:47:39.720
in taking care of ourselves—not just in the present moment, but for the future as well.
00:47:39.720 --> 00:47:41.900
[Liz] Well, thank you, so much, Gigi.
00:47:41.900 --> 00:47:46.320
I really do appreciate you contributing all of your ideas for this.
00:47:46.320 --> 00:47:49.850
Did you have anything else you wanted to share before we go?
00:47:49.850 --> 00:47:54.500
[Gigi] Just that I want to emphasize again these are generalizations.
00:47:54.500 --> 00:47:58.410
My brother Mark may not fit your friend who comes from poverty.
00:47:58.410 --> 00:48:03.330
But people of middle class need to understand that the little group of second graders,
00:48:03.330 --> 00:48:07.300
who seem to be louder than the other children, are probably children of poverty,
00:48:07.300 --> 00:48:09.330
and there's a reason for that.
00:48:09.330 --> 00:48:14.030
And learn how to celebrate and acknowledge each other's values and norms.
00:48:14.030 --> 00:48:15.030
Thank you.
00:48:15.030 --> 00:48:17.950
[Liz] So, we wanted to thank you all for listening.
00:48:17.950 --> 00:48:22.190
This is Liz Watkin and I wanted to thank Gigi Derballa for sharing her ideas.
00:48:22.190 --> 00:48:26.920
We will make the PowerPoint available to you, as well as Gigi's email address,
00:48:26.920 --> 00:48:32.220
if you have questions that you would like to pose about the topic of generational poverty.
00:48:32.220 --> 00:48:33.800
She can talk to you.
00:48:33.800 --> 00:48:35.700
And everybody have a great day!